Cabooze

I'm extremely confused and to be quite honest disappointed in what I use to believe to be the best basketball fans in the world. As a life-long fan of the Utah Jazz, and a lover of the beautiful sport which is basketball I am appalled with what I've been hearing. I have heard over and over that Carlos Boozer is selfish, egotistical, a ball hog, a jerk, an idiot, and that he isn't good for the Jazz. This argument is ludicrous. Carlos Boozer is the single most important player on the team. The Jazz's success can be directly tied to how Boozer is playing. I will admit that at times he doesn't seem to play as hard as he should, however, with a little more support and love he will. Boozer is the type of guy that needs the love of those around him. He needs the support of his fans; he feeds off of our energy and love. I once had a dog that would poop all over my house, I use to scream at it constantly and it continued to give me crap. Finally, I started to encourage it when it pooped outside, I would give it praise and cheer it to victory. If we want crap from Booze we will scold him and yell at him, however, if we want a championship in Utah we must praise and encourage him. Let us look at some statistical evidence for Booze. When Booze scores 20+ points the Jazz are 19-3 this season. He is thrid in the league for double-doubles trailing only Chris Bosh and Dwight Howard. He has increased his assists this year from a career average of 2.5 to 3.5. His rebounds are up, his steals are up, and his blocks are up. CaBooze has also increased his willingness to give a hard foul which has made him an absolute beast in the paint. Also, Booze is much better looking this year, his acne is nearly gone, his teeth have been whitened, and he has been hitting the gym hard. You would be surprised how much better people perform when they improve their looks. This has been evidenced over and over in history: Urkel was only able to get girls when he revealed his cool alter-ego of stephan; we can't forget that the reason that the batman movies are so much better than the spiderman movies is that Christian Bale is so much better looking than Tobey "douche" Maguire. He is the single most important player on our team this year. His team chemistry has improved completely also: he is always grinning and high-fiving his teammates, he was the first person to run onto the court when Sundiata hit the game winner against Cleveland, and he is constantly yelling the ball into the rim on his and his teammates shots. He and D-Will seem to have worked out some of the chemistry problems they were having and now Booze has gone to the front office and asked not to be traded because he knows that this is he and D-Will's year. I am pleading with you Jazz fans, "We must back Boozer, he is our ticket to the championship."